Friday, February 19, 2010

“I am so Embarrassment…” Sensei said.

Some of my famous words that earn me that irrefutable nonchalant nature in class.

“It’s 4:40 in my timepiece. Twenty minutes so be back at 4:60… You may break yourselves…”

Sino sa inyo ang puwedeng mahiraman ng USB na willing magka-virus?”

Ahh, akala ko kasi lahat ng tao nakaka-experience ng almoranas… Sorry, baka sa family lang namin ‘yon… Teka, did I just say I always have hemmorrhoids?! Embarrassment.”

“Oh my, we have an international schudent? Ano ba ‘yan? Bakit 'di niyo sinabi agad? Sorry, I haven’t read the dictionary last night. I am already… Nauubusan ng English…”

“Okay, you go inject yourselves.”

Wachamakol it? Wachamakoldat?

Bakit kayo nag-aayos ng gamit? Ang yayabang ninyong maglabas ng bag. Bakit? Did I dismiss you already? Porke ba Jansport ang mga bag niyo?!

“Sorry class, I can’t attend to you right now, I’m thesising.”

“Get one half sheet of fafer. Yes, fafer. With a capital fee.”

Ang hindi makasagot sa number one, pangit.”

Ang manghula ng edad ko, ibabagsak ko! I said stop! ANO’NG FORTY KA DIYAN?!”

Pengeng candy class. Hypoglycemic na ‘ko.”

Haha, hindi naman ako mahilig sa brown. Mukha na ‘kong troso.”

“Class, ano na nga ‘yung tagalog ng English?”

“I hope you learn your lesson Ms. Pasaway. Your confiscated Blackberry touchscreen may be retrieved next week. Ano ba’ng features nito, nang magamit? Joke.” (I actually toyed with it before I surrendered to the Dean).

“There is really no distinct color of semen. It might not be as white contrary to popular belief. Ahmmm, boys ‘di ba sa underwear, if we--- if you mast--- I mean, when you get ahmmm… wet dreams… ‘di ba it turns into a yellow stain…? (looks at the CCTV camera in the classroom) That didn’t sound right, did it? Next time don’t ask me questions like that Mr. Preoccupied, you’re getting me fired.”

Sa mata makikita ang clitoris… Este, I mean… Iris pala.”

“Excuse me. All my clothes are D & G. Divisoria and Greenhills.”

“Sorry class, puwedeng magkamali? Tao lang.”

“Class, you have to understand that spirituality doesn’t have to be about god alone. We talk about faith. We talk about values. It’s the belief that there is that transcending force that controls all things… It can be our God… It can be Allah… It can be the nature, the trees, the mountains… It can be stones… It can be money… It can be that buddha sculpture… It can be love… It can be fate…



It can be… ME.”



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wind_psycho: TATAG!








3 comments:

  1. whudabout it can be me? lol

    tawang tawa naman ako sa mga lines mo! haha makahiram nga ng iba. haha

    etong 2 fave ko:

    “Ang hindi makasagot sa number one, pangit.”

    “Ang manghula ng edad ko, ibabagsak ko! I said stop! ANO’NG FORTY KA DIYAN?!”

    laughtrip!!!

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  2. panalo yung semen. this made my day!!! =D

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  3. @citybuoy: haha. eh kasi ang dali naman talaga ng sagot sa number one. may nagkamali pa. haist.

    @engel: after that semen statement, the students were just awkwardly staring at me. cold air. it took me a while before i retaliated hahaha...

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